Monday, 6 October 2008

Tuesday 27 March 2007

I return!!

My lengthy absence hasn't been entirely my fault. My partner must take her share of the blame. She has been exceedingly busy with her play, which has now finished. She did lift me into the typing chair a week or so ago, but AOL was playing up and wouldn't let me make my blog entry with the pictures I wanted to share.

I have missed making my blog entry regularly. I did think about fashioning some sort of device with which I could winch myself into the typing chair, but I foresaw each of my ideas ending in significant personal injury to my furry little self, so I remained quietly blogless for the duration of my partner's theatricals.

I have enjoyed myself today. Although the same cannot be said of my partner. For today I made a kill. Yes, dear reader, Jasper has not lost his touch. I skilfully claimed the life of a young squirrel at Abbotstone. He was quite big, although he hadn't got his bushy tail yet. I was terribly pleased with myself and was about to consume my prize when my partner approached. To say she was appalled would be to grossly understate her views. Her pained look put me right off and I wasn't able to eat it, so left it where it lay. As we returned to the car, my partner instructed me to use my blog entry to apologise to squirrels everywhere and to anyone who may feel distressed by the loss of the squirrel youth. But this puts me in a quandary, for my partner does not like it when I am untruthful. She cannot have both in this situation. I have decided that the easiest option is the least honest one, SO - Squirrel: I am sorry I killed you (but you would have tasted absolutely delicious - hee hee hee).

Tomorrow I will write more about my partner's play, for anyone who can be bothered to pretend to care about that nonsense. All you really need to know is that, despite her happiness at its runaway success, she is distressed because HE didn't come to see it. I'm barking nothing.

Good night.

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