Friday, 11 March 2016

Thursday 10 March 2016

Ohh sh😠tbags; I's in milks. This mayks me three times cross. Is coming pups, nonono I is pure. Is ghost babyes of or what not I kanow.*

Oh goodness! Somewhat unexpectedly, I appear to be producing milk. This has three possible outcomes, none of which please me.

I could be pregnant. But this could not be the case, as (whilst I am very fond of men) I keep myself tidy "down there" and retain my virginity.

I could be experiencing a phantom pregnancy. I sincerely hope this is not the case.

I can't think of a third option.

Bl**dy h*ll...