Sunday 13 August 2006

To Abbotstone Down for my exercise today. Increasingly concerned about the nuisance caused by Squirrels. What purpose do they serve? I was walking through the wooded area, only to find myself pelted from on high with cobnuts. My partner said that they just dropped them, but I know that it was no accident. I hate squirrels. Their tails are completely frivolous and serve no purpose. Squirrels were obviously created by the same people that get all their opinions from gossip columns and other peoples' blogs.

On the whole a good day though. My partner did not receive any messages from the man she loves (a complicated story). He often forgets to get in touch, which inevitably leads to tears. I am tired of using my fur to mop up her tears. I don't think she should be turning her attentions to other men anyway. What can they offer her that I can't? The rake's initials are BC. His good points (in her opinion, they are only negatives to me) are that he's good-looking, funny, polite, fit, has a nice car, mutual friends say he's a good bloke, he fancies her just as she is. His bad points (these are promising traits as far as I am concerned): he remains aloof, forgets to contact her when he says he will, strings her along a bit. I shall keep the blog updated with progress. I hope he disappears altogether. Frankly, I can't understand why a woman would want any man who isn't (a) a Staffordshire Bull Terrier or (b) me. But the world is full of these mysteries.

Which leads me back to squirrels. A big mystery. They annoy me almost as much as cats. I don't understand them either - they are obviously intelligent creatures, so why do they waste their time and energy being cats when they could easily be little dogs?
My basket beckons. I don't want to waste any more time thinking about squirrels. Or nuts, particularly since my operation. Good night.